I'm all alone here, and I'm beginning to think that I wasn't prepared for this. It's not the military life, not really, it's me. I have never spent more than a few nights alone. Growing up my mom was always there, and I spent most almost all of my adulthood living with my mother. There was always someone around even if it was just someone breathing in the other room. The only doubt I had about moving in with my boyfriend was that I would never get to experience living on my own. I was wrong.

I only work a couple of hours a day so for the most part you can find me sitting in my apartment watching tv or in front of the computer. The independent part of me enjoys having time to myself and it's not like I don't have friends to hang out with, but it's lonely here. I find myself talking to my cats a little too much. I find myself watching tv when I hate tv. I find myself missing him more than I did when he was deployed just because at least then I was at my mom's house.

Sometimes I wonder how I am going to survive his next deployment, but then I remember how lucky I am. I have some amazing friends who would never let me spend 6 months alone. I also have an amazing boyfriend who is worth waiting for. I am cutting this entry short because as I wrote about how much I miss him I got a call saying he was coming home now, a day early!